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Keith Kehrer has finished work on a full length motion picture for Three Day Dawn called Standalone.

Read Interview with Keith Kehrer about film scoring

Part 4 - Yes, we have no bananas

My mother was an operatically trained singer. But, that's no excuse. To take grown men and subject them to such ridiculous frivolity is uncalled for. The nerve of that woman. Ok, let me back up here and explain myself.

My mom has been singing and has been in shows probably since birth. I think she popped out of the womb singing Italian arias. Many years later, she is teaching voice, directing choirs and pushing her musical baby bird out of the nest (on my head?). That's me. Usually once a year, she would plan and direct some kind of musical production enlisting choir members, friends, my dad, and me in various tasks such as performing musical numbers, playing in the pit band, building sets and all the other things that make a show come alive.

I am sure you are wondering what all this has to do with the absence of bananas. I am getting to that. Be patient.

For a few years, my mom put on these church productions called reviews. There was the gay nighties review, the 1920's review and the last one was the 1940'review. Thank god she stopped there. I am not sure what a 1950's or 1960's review would be like and having lived through the late 70's and 80's, I would rather not go there again. Though, the thought of all the older church choir ladies doing the Hustle amuses me in a sick way. But, I digress.

The 1920's review was a little more interesting because that was a time of craziness all that hot jazz, bathtub gin and such. My mom had to tone it down a little because the Eatontown Methodist Church would have probably frowned on the degree of bacchanalian hijinks so prevalent during that era. She did however push the envelope on gender roles. I am not sure how she did it but imagine this; a stage full of men wearing dresses and humming on kazoos. How Freudian is that? And if that wasn't enough, we were all singing (you guessed it) "Yes we have no bananas" much to the delight and amusement of the audiences who came in droves. I bet they were wondering if there was anything underneath those dresses. Scotsmen wear kilts and nothing else. Why not the banana singers sans jockeys. I swear my mother had a smirk on her face every time we did that number. You know what they say. "Sex sells!" even cross dressing kazoo players.

Thanks mom. I don't think I ever played a kazoo again after that.